Laundry ... it ain't that easy...

Well, it's Friday (or Freitag, whatever...) and I've really got nothing to do. It's only 3:40pm (15:40) and I'm already home from work as I have been told that I wasn't supposed to be working more than 40 hours per week anyway. (Well, I wasn't supposed to be entering more than 40 hours per week into my timesheet which - in my mind at least - means that I won't be working more than 40 hours per week...) So, I'm home a bit early today and really have no plans... The last couple of days have been extremely rough for me and I'm pretty much in one of those 'deep blue funks' anyway, so it's probably a good thing that I didn't actually plan anything for this evening...

I figured this would be a good time to do my laundry; unfortunately when I walked over to where the washer and dryer are located I noticed that somebody else already had a load in the washer. Oh well, that's cool... The machine appeared to be telling me that there was something like 13 minutes left on the load that was in there and I figured I'd head back to my apartment and start typing up a blog while I was waiting. Hopefully my clothes will still be there when I return...

Laundry here is actually rather interesting. I mean, for one thing, there is exactly one washer and dryer that I am aware of. I'm not sure how many apartments are sharing this one pair of appliances; but I am definitely sure that it's a number much larger than one. So far I've been very lucky. Every time I've gone to do laundry (except, of course, for today ... but that doesn't surprise me with the way my weeks been going...) the machines have been available. Of course with my extremely heavy social life (try to catch the sarcasm here...), I've been doing laundry on Thursday evenings. I figured it was a good chance that the machines might be available... Unfortunately, yesterday was just a very bad day ... so I didn't do my laundry. Therefore, I'm doing it today.

Another interesting fact about doing laundry here is that the damn machines don't take money. No, that would be too easy I guess... I mean here I am, in a country that has chosen to use euros for currency, and the two laundry machines that I have access to don't even take euros. Okay, so a little explanation might be needed here... Coins are much more useful over here in the European Union countries. The smallest amount on any paper bills is actually €5. They have coins in denominations of 1¢, 2¢, 5¢, 10¢, 20¢, 50¢, €1 and €2. So, a wash cycle costs €1 and a dryer cycle costs €1.50. Rather than having the machines just accept the coins that are already in abundant supply and are of easy amounts to manage this, they have set it up so that you need to purchase tokens to use. And, it's a different token for the washer and dryer respectively. Okay, so they want to complicate things. The tokens would be easy enough to obtain, right? Wrong. Check this out...

Rather than having a machine, or something, dispense these valuable tokens, you are forced to basically go on a little quest. I was actually briefly told about this by my landlord when I was checking out the apartment. As we were walking around and he was showing me the place, we were walking through the parking garage and he pointed out this little room that actually looked like little more than a closet. It had a glass pane above the door and my landlord informed me that this was where I went to obtain the laundry tokens. He said that the best time to try would be around 9:30am and that what I needed to do was walk down to where this little room was and look to see if the light was on inside. If I was able to see light coming out of the small pane of glass above the door then that would mean that the guy who sold you your tokens was at work. I could then purchase my laundry tokens from him.

Oh well, how hard could it be? 9:30 was a bit of a pain as I would usually be at work then, but I figured I'd just have to come in a bit late on the days that I needed to restock my laundry tokens ... I could do that. I had no clue as to just how difficult this journey would actually end up being...

When I moved in to this apartment, the landlord had a few tokens left over from when he used to live here. There were something like 5 washer tokens and 2 dryer tokens. Oh well, I figured I had a couple weeks before I needed to obtain any refills, so I kinda put the procedure into the back of my mind for later access. I had no issues doing my laundry on the first week and used one each of the washer tokens and dryer tokens. When the time came around again to once again do my laundry I figured that I best go and obtain some more dryer tokens. I only had one left, so I figured I take it with me to show the guy as I was expecting communication to be difficult...

The thing is, pretty much the only things that I can really say in German are, "Ich spreche kein Deutsch (I don't speak any German)" and "Sprechen Sie Englisch? (Do you speak English?)" I was thinking that these wouldn't get me very far... As you will read below, I was unfortunately correct. First, however, I needed to venture down to the dark parking garage and see if I was lucky enough to find a light.

To my amazement, when I finally remember where this little room was actually located, I notice that there is in fact a light on inside. Cool, this'll be easy... I knock on the door. Nobody answers. Okay, what now? Apparently this 'Grounds Keeper Willie' is around here somewhere - the question is where? I quickly find an old man mopping the east entrance stairway and approach him. I kick things off with, "Entschuldigung. Ich spreche kein Deutsch. Sprechen Sie Englisch? (Excuse me. I don't speak any German. Do you speak English?)" He basically just stands there and looks at me like I'm some kind of alien from outer space. I then whip out the ole dryer token and start saying things like, "Buy. Purchase. I need these..." He suddenly appears to understand what I am wanting, puts down his mop, takes the token from me and signals me to follow him. He then leads me back to the small room in the parking garage, opens the door and shows me a tray that has the tokens I am looking to purchase.

Sweet! The mother load! Okay, so I then go into my charades mode (that’s kinda how I have to speak to a lot of people around here ... I really need to learn German...) and try my best to explain to him that I am looking to purchase some of the dryer tokens. This goes on for some time ... he's speaking to me in German (which I don't understand) and I'm speaking to him in English (which he clearly doesn't understand) and we're doing our little dance. He then closes and locks the door and leads me up to where the washer and dryer are. I'm trying to tell him that I know where the washer and dryer are, I know what the tokens are for and I just need to buy more dryer tokens but he continues walking...

We then enter the room that houses the washer and dryer and this poor guy starts trying to explain to me that you need the tokens without the hole for the washer and the tokens with the hole drilled in them for the dryer. But I already know this. I did a load of laundry just a week ago. I decide that I need to be more blunt and pull out my wallet. The sad thing here is that all I had in the said wallet was a €100 bill and a €5 bill. I figured that €5 wasn't going to get me many tokens so I pull out the €100 bill and show it to the guy. His immediate response is that he starts shaking his head and saying, in German of course, something like, "That's way too much." I return the bill back to my wallet and then pull out the 5. Okay! I think he gets it now and motions for me to follow him once again.

We then head back down to his little room in the parking garage and he opens the door. I pretty much know the numbers in German and I figure out that he is telling me that the washer tokens are €1 each and the dryer tokens are €1.50. I use my charades talk to inform him that I don't need any washer tokens, but that I want to buy some dryer tokens. He finally gives me 3 dryer tokens and a 50¢ piece for change.

This is good, however if you were paying attention you will realize that I gave him a dryer token when I first met him mopping the stairs. I was actually getting shorted by 1 dryer token and I tried to explain this to him. I must have wasted a good 15 minutes attempting to explain that I was actually due one more token for the 5 euros that I gave him; however finally realized that it was pointless. So I got taken for €1.50 - at least I was able to get a couple more tokens and avoid this catastrophe for another few weeks. I gave up and headed back to my apartment. After all, I needed to get to work.

Well, that's the kind of crap that I've been living for the last couple months... If nothing else, it gives me stories... Of course it's now going on 6:00pm which is still a bit early to head over and try to find Bine again... Maybe I'll watch some TV...

bis später,

Coriolis