Sot

So this happened…

Last Saturday I decided to head on up to Sports Haven – my ‘local bar’ of late.  Arrived somewhat early in the afternoon (approximately 3:00pm) and met up with Ron for some coneys and beers.  $1 coneys are always seen as a good deal by me and, since Sports Haven has ‘em three days each week and is a rather short walk from my parent’s, I take advantage of the deal on a somewhat regular basis.  Invited both Ron and Erik to join me this time.

Ron and I arrived pretty much simultaneously – he even yelled something at me as his car passed me walking although I couldn’t make out what he said and never bothered to find out … I’m sure it was something silly as that’s just the way we are…  He was exiting his vehicle as I arrived at the bar.

We entered the bar, grabbed a table and ordered up some coneys and a couple beers.  I also got myself an order of fries.  And this was the beginning – two coneys, an order of fries and beer #1 for me.  I won’t track what the others had as that information is inconsequential to my story.  For me, however, it’s two coneys, one order of fries and a beer at this point.

We were sitting there enjoying our food, sipping on our beers and chatting when Erik arrived.  He joined us at our table and ordered himself a coney and a beer.  I believe this was where I decided to grab myself another coney and beer as well.  Not quite sure if this was my second or third beer although it seems to me that it was merely my second.  Not sure what time it was when Erik arrived, but I do believe that both Ron and I had already eaten our coneys and consumed our first brews – must have been around 3:30.  This now brings my running total up to three coneys, an order of fries and two beers.

The three of us were sitting there contemplating solutions to the various problems we’re currently being faced with in this shitty world that we find ourselves living in … or perhaps we were just reminiscing over previous attempts we made at the same; either way, we were once again ticking away the moments that make up a dull day as we had so many times before.  It’s always a blast to get the opportunity to chat with these guys.  I’ve known both pretty much my entire life and, regardless of how long the time span is between meetings, the conversation picks up from where we left off effortlessly.  Once again, we were at it.

Ron, at some point, received a phone call from his son and invited him to join us.  He lives close by and joined the three of us soon thereafter.  This was when I ordered my third beer … must have been somewhere around 4:00.

I believe it was about an hour or so that all four of us sat there sharing stories before Erik, Ron and his son needed to leave.  Must have been close to 5:00 when they all did just that and I decided to stay at the bar by myself.  I had nothing else to do and figured I might as well waste away the rest of the day hanging out at the bar, having a few beers and watching some football or whatever.  It’s not like I needed to worry about driving home later or anything – my journey home was known to be merely a 15-minute walk as usual.  I go to that bar primarily because it’s only “stumbling distance” from my home avoiding the worry of perhaps drinking a bit too much.  No drive, no problem…

I remember basically burning through the remainder of that day.  I watched the Chiefs eliminate the Colts and the Rams take out the Cowboys; participated in your typical, bullshit small talk that consistently occurs between patrons in sports bars; ordered up some more fries and had a couple more coneys ($1-a-piece, why not?).  I was also, throughout the entire day, drinking beers.  I wasn’t really keeping track of how many beers I ordered however there were seven listed on the final tab I paid prior to leaving the bar.  It was slightly after 2:00am when I began my walk home – some 11 hours after arriving.

Thinking back on the evening/night later, I do not recall actually doing any “binge” drinking.  The seven beers on my tab actually seemed like too many when I received it and I remember saying the same to Coreen, the bartender.  Since they were on special (I think they were something like $1.75 each) and I didn’t really want to argue over something so petty, I just paid the tab.  She may have accidentally included the three beers I had already paid for from earlier in the day, but who really knows…?  I didn’t much care.

As to my condition, I felt fine – a little tipsy, but overall stable.  I distinctly remember the walk home as clear as a bell.  I remember entering my parent’s house, switching the light in the living room on, brushing my teeth, switching off the light in the living room and going to bed.  I remember all of that as being completely normal.  I felt completely sober.  I wasn’t stumbling or anything.  It was approximately 2:20 in the morning…

Next thing I vaguely remember was – oh, I’m not exactly sure how to describe this – “coming to” perhaps … somehow lying slumped in the corner of the bathroom and hearing this scale that my parents have (the electronic speaking type) sounding off that, “Your weight is twenty point zero pounds,” followed shortly by getting assisted up by my father in my bedroom where I apparently fell again.  I then headed back to my bed and lied there for some unknown amount of time (not long, though…) before getting up and noticing that my underarm deodorant had been knocked over on my dresser and wondered exactly what happened with that.  I don’t remember getting out of bed to begin with, heading into the bathroom nor returning to my bedroom between the two occurrences of “coming to.”  Not only that, but I distinctly remember hearing the scale read off a weight of exactly 20.0 pounds exactly one time … it usually states the weight twice followed by a “powering down” announcement.  All I heard was one announcement of 20.0 pounds with no notification of powering down – at least that’s all I remember.  I’m positive that more was said.  I found out later, from speaking with my parents, that all this madness occurred sometime around 6:30am – that’s somewhere around four hours after I went to bed.

I also felt like I had been in a fight or something.  I hadn’t … but it was later explained to me, by my parents again, that I had apparently passed out in the bathroom (and the newly bent towel rack in there is a strong sign of where, exactly, that was) as well as in my bedroom where I ended up slumped between a dresser and the door of the closet.  My back and upper right arm had a couple somewhat deep scratches and, as I would soon find out, my coccyx (tailbone) got bruised … again.  Been noticing that basically for the entire last week although it seems to be getting better now…

So my mom’s pissed now – I did mention the bent towel rack, right…? – and I’m confused.  What the hell happened?  It’s gotta, at least in some aspect, be related to what I drank the evening before; but I felt fine when I walked home.  I’m not just saying that as a joke – I’ve been drunk many times before and do know what being drunk feels like.  I was steady as a rock when I left the bar and walked home.  Although it is possible that I drank as many as ten beers that day – although I’m thinking the total was closer to seven – that was in the span of eleven hours.  Either way that’s less than one beer per hour … and the beers were of the ‘short’ variety – they were on special at $1.75 a piece, so they weren’t large.  And why would I be passing out some four hours after going to sleep?  I’m still wondering exactly what happened there…

So now I’m thinking that I damn well better stop drinking completely.  That’s a bummer … it was nice to go have a few beers as a brief escape from this shit-show that my life has become every once in a while; but after that experience I’m thinking I better quit that.  I don’t know, is that possibly a sign of impending alcoholism?  Now that’s something I most definitely do not need.  Oh well, one more minor pleasure gone.  Life just continues to get shittier and shittier…

bis später,

Coriolis

There Really Oughtn’t

I hate people.

Okay, so that statement might be taken the wrong way by many – oh wait, that statement most definitely will be taken the wrong way. Whatever… The fact of the matter is that I, for one, have basically reached the end of my line when it comes to the myriad of idiots in our society these days. And I’m not about to claim that I am smarter than everyone else – far from it! What I am wondering is exactly how have we (the “normal” people) let the admittedly few douche-bags of society have so much power? Or perhaps – as usually seems to be the case – I’m wrong here. I doubt it, but I suppose it’s possible. Hear me out on this…

As I’m sure many of you already know, Penn and Teller have this wonderful show on Showtime named, aptly enough, “Bullshit!” Seeing as I decided long ago not to spend money on any of your premium cable channel offerings (it just seemed like a waste of money to me), it wasn’t until late last year that I stumbled on this show using the rather recently introduced “Instant View” feature on Netflix. Once I discovered it though, I was hooked. Finally! Somebody out there is asking the correct questions and basically showing these scam artists for what they are. Unfortunately, the more I watched, the more I realized what the actual problem is – your average Joe Schmo (at least the one’s living in America today) is more than willing to throw away any and all common sense for the opportunity to believe pretty much anything. If the bullshit were true, life would seem better; therefore people relish the idea of taking blind faith in the bullshit. Whatever happened to demanding proof? Have we honestly turned into a society where belief in ideas has become more important than the search for truth?

And what the fuck is with this latest rash of husbands going to rehab for “sex addiction”? Come on … sex addiction?! Are you kidding me?? There is no such thing as sex addiction. What’s next? We’re going to be treating people for oxygen addiction or food addiction (oh wait, that second one already exists…)? I hate to say it, but if the male of our species weren’t “addicted” to sex, you and I (and pretty much the entire human population) probably wouldn’t be here. The problem is not that these guys have an addiction; it’s that they have a penis. Personally, I consider these guys weak. I’ve written about this before and my opinion remains unchanged. Society attempting to justify infidelity as a disease, however, is pure bullshit.

But that’s what we’re looking for, right? – A way to justify our actions without having to actually legitimize them. That way we can do whatever we want and pass any consequences onto somebody else. For these “sex addicts”, it’s not their fault – they’re the real victims here. I guess if they did the impossible and didn’t sleep around on their wives they might have had to suffer blue balls for a bit. Sure, they could easily alleviate this on their own (it’s called masturbation and man has been doing it since man has been…); but I guess that’s too much to ask of these alpha males. No … it’s far better to give them a pass and let them do what they do so well – it’s not like they’ve promised not to do it… Marriage, after all, is such a dated concept.

Then there’s this new fad (and “fad” is how I would best describe it) where peer groups and, even more disturbingly, school officials are being blamed for teenage suicides. Now I understand how somebody committing suicide always has a devastating effect on those that loved them; however when was it decided that the best way to deal with these tragedies was to find somebody else to blame? We’ve all been teenagers. We all know what teenagers need to go through. For those that forgot, it’s called “growing up”. Each of us had our own unique experiences during this period and each of us found ways to cope. Unfortunately, this journey is more difficult for some; but that’s life. Holding friends (or enemies) and teachers responsible when a teenager fails to cope accomplishes nothing more than passing the feeling of failure (because I’m sure that’s what the parents feel) onto somebody else.

So what we end up with is kids being punished for being kids and adults being punished for not being able to see the future. And how, exactly, should we punish these (what should I call them?) “accomplices” for the extremely vague crime that they are supposedly guilty of? Throw ‘em in jail, perhaps? Oh, I know, let’s make the school pay millions of dollars to the kid’s parents – that’s almost as good as a resurrection I suppose… After all, the kid would still be alive if the school did its job … right?

But that’s not exactly what I’m on about and before I get too far off subject, let me return. The point I am eager to get out there is that people need to stop taking often asinine claims as truth based purely on faith. And yes, I include all religions in this basket as well. We are currently living in the most scientifically advanced era that this blue-green sphere we have chosen to call Earth has ever seen. Why, I ask, are so many people almost eager to ignore basically everything we’ve learned to get us here? Fear of the unknown is no excuse to act like a lemming…

I watched the latest episode of South Park last night – the “Medicinal Fried Chicken” episode – and almost died laughing. That show always does a wonderful job of pointing out the absurdity of our culture, usually in an even more absurd way – men purposely contracting prostate cancer in order to legally purchase weed … classic… This is yet one more example of what I am getting at. I’ve been to Amsterdam. I lived for nine months in Germany where (and I doubt many of you are aware of this) it is perfectly okay to posses up to 10g of marijuana for your personal use. They understand the dangers (or lack there of) associated with letting people smoke grass if they so choose. However here, in the “land of the free”, you’re not allowed to – although, in more and more states, this restriction is only being placed on healthy people. Now how stupid is that…?

And it all goes back to somebody, somewhere, insisting that some fact existed (smoking marijuana is a “gateway drug” for instance – that always cracks me up…) supporting whatever agenda (usually religious – always about controlling others…) they want to push. What this oftentimes results in is a loss of freedom and it’s looking more and more like nobody cares. The anti-smokers out there have basically outlawed smoking (any and all, not just pot) in pretty much any public area (if this hasn’t hit where you live yet, just wait – it will) using lies. They blatantly over-exaggerate the effects of breathing secondhand smoke to make it seem like this nuisance to them is life threatening for all. It’s not and nobody is insisting that anybody stay in an uncomfortable environment – I’m sure nobody would miss these tight-ass, presumptuous kill-joys if they decided to leave the bar… But making it illegal for all to smoke … isn’t that going a bit too far…?

I don’t know … perhaps I’m missing something here. Did I miss the meeting where it was decided that everybody should stop considering others and just assume that whatever belief system they’ve decided to subscribe to is the only valid viewpoint that exists, even when this system is based on nothing more than pure faith? As Penn Jillette so often puts it, “When somebody says ‘there ought to be a law,’ there probably oughtn’t.”

bis später,

Coriolis

Aye Batter Batter

For the last couple of weeks, I’ve been attending “alcohol/drug addiction education” classes. Not to learn how to get addicted to alcohol or drugs – that would just be silly – but rather as group counseling sessions (usually mandated by a California court) aimed at helping addicts to quit their addictions. I’m only there as a “good will” gesture suggested by my lawyer in order to get an obstruction of justice charge dropped – I am not an addict. That being said, I’ve decided to give you, the reader my analysis of just how useless I believe these sessions would be for me if I were an addict. To sum it all up, I believe these court-mandated counseling sessions for fee are just one more of the seemingly endless pieces of bullshit that our government (well, the California government at least) has decided to force on the citizens to allow the self-assuming superior people a false sense of helping others. Let me explain…

First off, let me sum-up what I have been able to learn about how “the system” here in California works. The way it goes is that, if you get busted for some sort of drug/alcohol related crime (mainly possession and DUI), there is a possibility that the court will give you the option of attending these “educational” group sessions rather than going to prison. What the odds of getting this option are is still unknown to me; however it appears that where you get busted as well as who you get busted by seems to have some impact on this happening. Of course since I’m using these sessions for a court case in Colorado, I did not experience this procedure first-hand; however it doesn’t take a genius to realize that a large majority of people presented with this choice would opt for the counseling, right…? One would think…

There’s a little bit of a twist to the counseling option though – it’s a “pay for” service. This means that, if you’re interested in taking the “education”, you need to be willing and able to pony up some cash. It’s $30 per session plus a registration fee. In my case, the registration fee alone was $260. Whether this is a conventional amount or some sort of “special” pricing they came up with for my unique case (it brought my total amount due with the eight sessions to an even $500) I am unaware; however since the typical court-ordered counseling is either a 16 or 24 week stint (one class per week), the pricing for this option can easily get out of reach for many people. So basically what we have here is a government run court of law giving “get out of jail free” cards only to those that can afford them. Isn’t it ironic … don’t ya think?

To add to this irony, the government gets absolutely none of the money that is paid for these classes – none! There are actually institutions in California that have somehow arranged it so that courts can “strongly suggest” people pay them for their services else go to jail. Courts can mandate that somebody either purchases a service being offered by a private institution or go to jail. Am I the only one who finds this fascinating? I mean yeah, there are strict rules that need to be adhered to in order to complete this counseling; but it sure beats going to prison! So basically you’ve got private institutions that have obtained the right to have people forced by the courts to buy their services. And the worst part about all this is that their services (at least as far as I’m concerned) don’t work…

Why do I say this? Well for many reasons. The first of which is the number of people in the classes I’ve been attending that have “been here before” … for quite a few, many times. Several of the students have even been to prison already and are using this option as a change of pace. For this spin through the judicial revolving door they’ve decided to take a much more expensive, somewhat more scenic route. If nothing more than positive results were used to justify the existence of these non-prison options, I seriously doubt they would be around much longer. But then what would we do with the sudden influx of people in need of incarceration? Is this no more than a way to keep prison populations down?

The main reason however that I believe these classes don’t work is based on the fact that I’ve been attending them for some nine hours now and have learned absolutely nothing. It’s exactly what I was expecting it to be – well intentioned people spouting out dime-store philosophy to a completely uninterested audience. Most (if not all) of the people are only there to stay out of jail and it’s extremely difficult (even for those with actual educational training) to teach those uninterested in learning. Having some former addict (and I do believe all of the instructors are former addicts) attempt to explain basic societal mores that I’ve been well aware of since elementary school to me seems like little more than an insult to my intelligence. Throw in their biased views on philosophy being taught as “must dos” and it becomes downright frightening.

But you can’t blame the people administering these classes. I do believe that they are actually trying to help. Unfortunately, the problem is not this counseling. The problem isn’t even the government giving people the option to buy their “get out of jail free” cards. I believe that the real problem we are facing today is the lack of responsibility shown by a large portion of the American people. Mix this in with an unrealistic need for vengeance upon the unknown for crimes that the media is doing their best to often times glamorize, slowly stir in an attempt to reach uniform consistency and let set.

What we end up with is what we currently have in California: laws becoming stricter with respect to drugs of all varieties and tolerances asymptotically approaching zero for those that try to test these law’s boundaries, prisons getting overcrowded with more and more three-strikers to the extent that alternatives need to be found quickly and finally the government mandating citizens to purchase services from private institutions else join the crowds already in prison. Has our society really come to this? Are many of the crimes committed actually worthy of the punishment they’ve incurred? I seriously doubt it…

Now you might be wondering exactly what I’m getting at here and I wouldn’t blame you at all for that – I’m kind of curious myself… It just seems to me that something needs to change. Perhaps we should get rid of the “three strikes” rule and go back to evaluating the severity of a crime on a case by case basis? Seems to me like that might just open up the possibility for a ton of new jobs considering the number of cases prosecuted each and every day. Maybe we should take a lesson from many of our friends across the pond and learn to start tolerating an individual’s decision to use drugs as long as nobody else is endangered. When you think about it, how is this any different than the use of alcohol…? Maybe we should instill the value of personal responsibility in our children so that these issues never arise.

I actually don’t know and am not about to claim that I have any answers. I will say however that the experiences I’ve been going through the last couple of months sure have posed a lot of questions…

bis später,

Coriolis

Another Night in Amsterdam

Oh well … once again, I headed back over to Amsterdam last weekend. Here’s the video:



Not much new to say about this … however I did bruise my butt bone rather badly when my legs just gave out in Stone’s Café… I do actually believe this to be my best video so far … enjoy…

bis später,

Coriolis

Addendum 2-11-07

Okay, so I’m not very happy with the quality you get with this streaming video. I actually have very high quality versions of all of my videos but they’re just too large for me to easily post somewhere.

If you’re interested in seeing these, all you need to do is catch me on Yahoo IM (coriolis364@yahoo.com). I’m usually online…

Now What?

I headed back to Amsterdam over the weekend. Unlike my previous trips (Trip 1 [A][B][C][D], Trip 2 [A][B][C], Trip 3 [A][B][C]), I decided not to visit with any prostitutes. You read that right – I did not purchase any sex. I was most definitely planning to – even brought the Viagra with me – but the way things turned out, I didn’t… I’ve come to realize that sex for the sake of sex just isn’t much fun (at least not for me, anymore) and actually paying somebody for the opportunity to not have any fun with them is asinine.

Not to mention that the whole “red light district” scene is getting old. Yeah, it was interesting when it was all new to me; however I’ve now spent many many hours in Amsterdam’s red light district and can now see what it really is – completely from first-hand experience, mind you... The best way that I can describe it would be to call it an adult-oriented Disney Land. There are plenty shows to see (sex shows, mainly), rides to ride (prostitutes) and foods to eat. The thing is that Disney Land even stops being fun if you go there too often.

So what, you might be wondering, was I doing in Amsterdam then? Well, that’s a darn good question. I really don’t know… I was pretty much there because “that’s where I go” every month or so. As I’m sure I’ve already mentioned, this “traveling by myself” thing isn’t working very well for me – I usually end up wasting way too much money and have little to no actual fun. I always figured that Amsterdam was the exception in that it was a place that I could pretty much guarantee myself some fun whether I’m traveling with someone or, as is usually the case, alone. I’m now beginning to wonder if I can even remember what “fun” is…

I did create a video while I was there. It’s nothing fancy or anything – just me chatting with myself and the camera whilst sitting in my hotel room a couple hours after eating a box of Philosopher Stones (a.k.a. Truffles – a shroom variety). Maybe I’ll post this thing somewhere and share it with you – with today’s technology it shouldn’t be too hard – however I really don’t know how interested people would be in seeing it. I mean, to sum it up, it’s really nothing more than me beating myself up about being the loser that I am.

Here it is:


So I guess that’s why I was in Amsterdam over the weekend – to make a video of myself emotionally beating myself up. That can’t be healthy… I don’t know – have I lost the ability to enjoy life? It seems to me that I’ve run out of things to look forward to. I’m looking forward to heading home for the holidays but then what? I’ll be returning back to Germany to finish my work and after the contract’s done heading back to Colorado to resume my “life as normal”… My life has turned into nothing more than an endless series of nothing. I exist for the sure purpose of existing…

Oh well, I really don’t have much else to say right now. Maybe I’ll head home this evening and start working on converting the video into a format that’s easier to post. Yeah … at least that’ll give me something to do… now done...

bis später,

Coriolis

So that was that...

So that was that. So far my trip wasn’t going anywhere near what I had planned. I was able to purchase some sexual stimulants; but they didn’t help. I had no problem in re-finding the girl in the baseball cap (Sarah); unfortunately the ineffectualness of these stimulants made that reunion far less exciting than the last time we met. I had myself a short visit with the “good girl gone bad” that ended up going nowhere – just an opportunity for me to piss away some more money. And the icing on the cake of a wonderful evening was that I managed to get hustled out of €500 by a couple very mean prostitutes and apparently came very close to possibly getting my ass kicked by Benny’s pimp! I just need to go to bed and get this day behind me…

That’s exactly what I did – I headed back to the Dam Hotel, climbed a couple flights of mind-bogglingly steep stairs (not quite as steep as the staircase at the Pink Floyd Coffee Shop, but close … if you’re ever looking for dangerously steep stairs, Amsterdam is the place to go…), checked out what was showing on the television (nothing…) and went to sleep. I was out of money but now knew the location of several ATMs nearby – tomorrow I’ll see what I can do. Maybe the sleep will do me good…?

When I awoke my first mission was to stop by the ATM and get enough money for the day. I was planning on trying my luck once again in the red light district and then just basically picking up some more weed (I already had what was left of the weed I purchased on Saturday as well as a stick of hash) and some more shrooms to take back with me. I decided to take out €400 – €200 for the prostitute and the rest for whatever… This, I did. I then headed back to the red light district to see who might be at work on a rather early Sunday morning…

As I have mentioned in an earlier posting, the red light district just isn’t the same on a Sunday morning as it is on a Saturday night – although I suppose that’s pretty obvious to most… I have since learned that you can always find somebody working. Luckily for me, the one girl that I found was Lek. You see, Lek was nice. She was a cute little Asian girl and I like cute little Asian girls… The best part about it was that she wasn’t trying to play me for the fool that we all know I am. I offered her €200 and everything was cool. She didn’t try to up the price on me for various “extras” not included in the original purchase and we had ourselves a very nice time. She even gave me her phone number when I was leaving so that I could contact her the next time I’m in Amsterdam.

That’s just the way it is in these situations; picking a prostitute is always a roll of the dice. Sometimes you get lucky – Lek, Sarah, Bine – but more often than not you just get screwed (and not in a good way…). You have to be very careful and selective – don’t put too much emphasis on appearance. Well, you need to make sure that the woman is appealing to you; however going for the silicon filled airhead might seem like a neat adventure but (for me, at least) always ends up badly. I’ll take an average looking nice lady over the super-model bitch any day…

Okay, so Lek treated me very nicely and I finally got to get the release I had been attempting to get since 8:30 the night before. I then headed back to Conscious Dreams to pick up a few varieties of shrooms and over to Coffee Shop 36 to chill out for a few hours. Once again, I had a train leaving around 3:00pm (well, 2:54 this time … there was some construction work being done at one of the stations and the regular train schedules were skewed a bit…) and I had a few hours to kill. I killed these sitting at Coffee Shop 36 watching the boats come and go. I took a few videos there and posted these up on my myspace page – nothing much, just a few shots of the boats and a shot inside the coffee shop… It was a nice way to relax and get the crap that happened the night before out of my thoughts – why dwell on it? I was stupid … time to get on with life…

After staying there for a few hours I needed to leave and head over to Centraal Station to catch a train. Jon and Veronica (Jon’s new squeeze) where taking the same train back and, although I was getting no response from them on my SMS attempts, I figured that I could maybe meet up with them at the station. I therefore left Coffee Shop 36 and headed toward Centraal Station.

Upon arriving at the station I quickly noticed that the train I was looking to catch (the IC 145) was not displayed on the boards yet – it was still a bit early. I decided to head over to platform 11A, took a seat on a bench outside of the actual station, ate half a box of one of the varieties of shrooms that I had and waited for the train. Luckily I was smart enough to double-check the board later and discovered that the IC 145 was leaving from a different platform this time (13, I think…). I then moved to the correct platform and was easily able to catch the train.

Upon boarding the train I met up with Jon and Veronica (never met Veronica before – seems like a nice enough girl…) and basically had an uneventful trip back to Germany. It was, in fact, quite a bit more uneventful than I was planning – the shrooms had no effect. I even ate the rest of the box on the train but nothing ever happened. Must have been a bad batch or something … either that or I’m actually building up a resistance to shrooms – now that I doubt…

Although this trip ended up being pretty bad overall, I do believe that I learned a few lessons. First, and foremost, I learned that this little battle that I am currently having with my ED issue is a dangerous thing. I learned that I need to accept the failures and just move on rather than putting myself in bad situations in an attempt to redeem myself – this is most definitely not the shape you want to be in whilst having to deal with prostitutes…

I believe I may have discovered the cause for my current ED problem – well, causes … I think there are a number. I mainly have this problem after a discrepancy arises between what I have actually purchased and what I “thought” I had purchased. I suppose I am going to have to improve my selection methodology to avoid this in the future… I think, however, that what I really need to do now is stop. Yeah, I know that I have a trip to Zürich coming up next weekend to visit with Surunna; however I think I should probably lay off the sex for a while before that. Maybe I just need to rest…?

bis später,

Coriolis

Whores...

So what do I do next? I go for a walk… I just finished my visit with Sarah (unsuccessful) and was a bit peeved over wasting €50 on the Libido pills that were completely useless. I figured I needed to walk this one off…

The thing is, I was in Amsterdam’s Red Light District – everywhere I walked there were prostitutes. I was very upset with not being able to complete the deal with Sarah and was basically walking it off through a plethora of “attainable” women – you just needed to give them a bit of cash. I’ll tell you right now that this is most definitely not the place that I needed to be “walking off” my failure. It was just a matter of time before I decided to try again – maybe I needed variety? While walking down an alley, I got a glimpse of this lady with what looked like reading glasses on – the librarian type otherwise known as the “good girl gone bad”. What the heck, I’ll give that a try.

** WARNING ** WARNING **
Okay, so I probably don’t need to say much; however I’m writing another post about Amsterdam’s Red Light District and I want to make sure that you, the reader, know what you are getting yourself into. If you’re under 18, please stop reading here. I’m sure you can find some interesting stuff over at Mtv.com or Disney.com but you really shouldn’t be reading this. Also, even if you are of age but have issues with sexuality please stop reading as well. I’m not planning on being too descriptive here, but you really never know what I’m stupid enough to type at times… You’ve been warned…

So I do a quick U-turn and head back to the woman that was wearing the glasses, enter her foyer and offer her €100 for a bit of fun. She invites me back to her room (the room that she “performed” in was actually down the hallway a bit from where she was attracting customers – this is a common thing…) and I start following her down the hall. It is now that I actually get my first real look at this woman and must admit that I was a bit disappointed. To sum it up in one well-known phrase, all I can say is “baby got back”. Now don’t get me wrong here, I realize that there are many men out there that are into the women with larger than average behinds – usually I’m not one of them. At this point in time, I really didn’t care. I was going to roll the dice and see what came up…

The answer to that was nothing. I didn’t even bother wasting too much of this lady’s time and decided that the €100 was just one more loss. I mean come on … there’s got to be something that I can do… I know, I’ll head back out and give it another go with one of the silicon filled boy-toys that are around here – there are plenty to choose from. I usually steer clear of this variety (they’re not the nicest people and they always have a bloated sense of superiority just because of the way they look – I’m not a fan of this…) but am trying to figure out what might work. I’m carrying €250 and I hide €150 behind my credit cards in my wallet and plan to use the remaining €100 to perhaps buy a half hour with one of the “beautiful people”. I see this blonde bombshell dressed up in a police uniform turned bikini and decide to stop and have a visit…

Her name was Benny. I’m telling you this just in case any of you readers are planning on heading to Amsterdam soon. If you go and meet up with a blonde bombshell (perhaps wearing a police uniform turned bikini) that tells you her name is Benny, leave as quickly as you can! Wait, I take that back … tell her Glen said “hi”, punch her square in the nose and then get the hell out of there! This bitch is mean! Here’s what this fucking whore decided to do to me:

I do the nice guy play and offer her €100 (the standard starting offer is €50, but I’ve discovered that the €50 doesn’t buy a guy much respect and usually leads to trouble ahead…) and she leads me back to her room. This is where the “routine” gets started. She begins, right away, telling me that we could have a lot more fun if I paid her €150 more. Interestingly enough, that was exactly how much I hid away in my wallet. Now remember, my night is not going very well and I’m very desperate to change that. I actually agree to the €250 price and give Benny the €150 that I hid in my wallet. You see, this is one of the reasons I stay clear of women like this – they know exactly how to take advantage of chumps like myself. I knew this, but I wasn’t thinking clearly – it’s amazing how much influence bad sexual experiences have on my logical skills…

So I’m in for €250. This should be enough for Benny. Okay, let’s get started… But wait, Benny then starts going on about how she wants to invite her “girlfriend” over and the three of us could have some fun. She starts telling me that for €500 (€250 more) I could have a real god time with the two of them. The thing is that I must be the dumbest man on the face of the Earth. I’ve done this ménage before – 3 or 4 times actually – and it’s always a bad idea. The current situation turns into this thing where Benny starts acting like she really wants her “friend” to be there and if I refuse that I wasn’t going to be having much fun. Oh well, maybe it’ll be better if the women involved actually wanted to be having sex with each other – that could be interesting… I reluctantly agree to head out to an ATM, get another €250 and return back for the fun.

As I’m getting dressed to head out again, the price suddenly shoots up and Benny starts telling me that I need to get €500 from the ATM! Fuck that!! I start removing my clothes again and tell Benny that there is no way in hell I’m getting another €500 and she quickly changes her story back to what we had agreed earlier. Apparently if I get the €250 it will be sufficient. I’m not feeling the least bit good about this, but I’m stupid enough to head out and get the required €250.

Oh yeah, and one more thing – you may already be aware of my admiration for pussy… This was also discussed with Benny before I was stupid enough to agree to get more money. What she told me was that, if I got the €250 more, there would be no issue. I would be able to do “whatever I desired” with both of the women. For some stupid reason, I believed her…

I returned back to Benny’s window with the additional €250 and am immediately invited in. After handing the money over, Benny calls across the alley and invites her friend over. The three of us then head back to Benny’s little room. Okay, let’s get this party started!

These two actually were friends. The reason I say this is because the next treat that I am presented with is the wonderful chance to lie naked on a bed between the two of them as they sat there and gossiped about a bunch of bullshit. This was when I started realizing that these were a couple of mean women. I mean yeah, that’s great, people often gossip at work; but I had just paid €500! Gossip on your own time – I paid for this time – do your job! It appeared as the gossip session was over when the friend began to lean over me. Right there in front of my face were two very well formed (and most likely rather expensive…) breasts. I leaned forward to kiss these newly met friends and get them pulled away with a firm notification that I’m not allowed to do that. WHAT?! What the hell did I just pay €500 for?! Not only that, but Benny had already promised me that I would be able to “kiss” much more than the breasts!

Well, that was it. I then called Benny a liar and laid there dejected as any erection that I was able to attain quickly vanished. I was then forced to lie there and get preached to by a couple of prostitutes! Get this! They were telling me that this was all my fault and how if I would have just laid there passively that everything would have gone smoothly. No shit everything would have gone smoothly – I just wouldn’t have had any fun. The whole reason that I was stupid enough t pay the €500 was to have some fun! The conversation got a bit heated and I actually demanded my money back (yeah, right, like that’s going to happen…). They refused to give me any money back and we were all aware that nothing was going to happen now – I was pissed!

Benny then suggested that I head out, take a walk and maybe smoke some weed. She was saying that I could return when I settled down a bit and they would pick up from where we left off – without me getting what was promised, of course… What could I do? It sounded like the only way I was going to get anything for the €500 I had already spent so I agreed. I headed over to the Stone’s Café and ordered a Coke. I sat there, smoked a couple bowls and drank my Coke. While doing this I came to the conclusion that I was just going to have to “suck it up” and play by these bitch’s rules – whatever … I could do that. I headed back to Benny’s window…

She was there. She had her little boom-box playing some shitty music and she was once again standing in her window luring in other unsuspecting chumps. I walked up to the window expecting to get let in. Unfortunately though, she never opened the door. Instead she just looked at me and grinned. She then reached over and turned the shitty music up a bit louder, staring at me and basically laughing the whole time. The only thing she said to me was “You’re too rough!” I’m too rough?! You have got to be kidding me! She wasn’t going to let me in!! FUCK!!!

She then got out her cell phone and started calling somebody (her pimp, I would assume). It was then that I decided to head down the alley a bit more and try to get my thoughts together. Well, it looks to me like I was just ripped off by a couple prostitutes for some €500! I stayed down the alley for a few minutes then headed back to Benny’s window…

I slowly walked by and loudly said to her, “You are a mean woman!” She quickly got on her phone and I just slowly continued to walk away. As I was walking away and blending into the large crowd, I distinctly heard a male voice behind me say, “Which one is he?” The response to this was a female voice (perhaps Benny) saying, “Dark coat and red T-shirt!” Funny thing is that I was wearing a black leather jacket and a red T-shirt… Luckily, however, my back was to them and my shirt was out of view. I heard a couple guys behind me getting stopped by the owner of the male voice that I heard earlier and a couple more iterations of the “Which one is he?” question as I continued to slowly walk away with the crowd.

What the fuck is that all about?! I mean, come on, I paid €500 and got nothing. Why does this suddenly put me into a situation where I’m apparently being hunted down by a pimp? I didn’t do anything wrong! I’ll tell you this though – I’m not going to feel nearly as sorry for the next whore that gets beaten up by a customer. I’ll bet she most likely deserved it…

bis später,

Coriolis

The Girl in the Baseball Cap

I went on my third trip to Amsterdam over the last weekend. It was the same deal as the last two trips – leave Braunschweig at 9:51am on Saturday and return back to Braunschweig somewhere between 8:00 – 9:00pm the next day … one more night in Amsterdam.

It’s funny how when you think that you’ve got “it” all figured out and you’ve come up with a rather detailed plan of how things are going to go that “it” usually ends up being something completely different… That describes the last weekend I had in Amsterdam pretty well. I was actually thinking that this trip would be pretty simple and that it wouldn’t even be interesting enough to actually write up in my blog. I was wrong … so very wrong…

Okay, so here was my plan: I was thinking that I would head on over to Amsterdam (skipping the trip to Paris the weekend before was a good move and I was able to get myself a bit more rested) and visit, once again, with the girl in the baseball cap. (By the way, her name is Sarah…) That was pretty much my entire agenda. I figured I’d fill in the rest of the 24 hours or so with a bit of sleep and a lot of hanging out in the coffee shops. It was simple and – comparative to my last couple trips – inexpensive. I also planned on trying to do something about this little issue I’ve been having with ED lately and, since the generic Viagra that I ordered online hasn’t arrived yet, decided to check out one of the ‘smart shops’ in Amsterdam. These places sold various sexual stimulants (I think it’s mostly herbal stuff and I was a bit skeptical on how well anything would work) so I figured I was game to try. That was the plan…

When I arrived at Amsterdam Centraal Station I started putting the plan into motion. The first thing I needed to do was to check into my room at the Dam Hotel. I knew where this hotel was located as I had seen it many times on my past couple of trips. The thing that I didn’t know was that this hotel was a bit strange. For one thing, there is absolutely no lobby for this hotel – none. There’s a restaurant at the bottom of the hotel and a money exchange window next to the restaurant. There is no door that is clearly marked as the entrance to this hotel! I was baffled … how the hell does one check-in to this hotel? I decided to ask a waiter working in the restaurant and was told that I checked in at the money exchange window and then either took the stairs up from behind there or the ‘lift’ that was located in the back of this restaurant. Oh, okay … I then waited in the line at the money exchanging window to check in…

After waiting what seemed like an unusually long amount of time for the guy in front of me to exchange whatever version of money he was carrying for Euros, I then asked to check-in to my room. I gave them the printout of my reservation as well as my American Express card to pay the €65. The card was rejected. I then passed them my Chase Mastercard but that card was also rejected. The third card I unsuccessfully tried was my Wells Fargo Visa Debit Card – rejected. Hmm, it’s only €65 – what’s going on? I’m still not sure why I’m having this issue with my credit cards – perhaps it’s all related back to my Athens trip – although I had some money on me and was forced to use €65 of it to pay for my room. I left the window, walked through the restaurant and took the ‘lift’ (very small lift, by the way…) up to my room. I dropped off the computer case I had (no computer, it’s just an easy way to carry the change of clothing and essentials needed for a one night stay) and headed on out. I was heading to the Art and Smart Shop that I discovered on my last trip. It was close by and I figured that they might have some sexual stimulants…

I walked into the shop and asked the nice young lady behind the counter whether they carried anything close to Viagra there. I was actually sold these pills that were called “Libido” – 10 pills, €50. Along with the Libido pills I also picked up a box of Mexicana shrooms and a cheap (€5) pipe. I then returned back to my hotel room. I think it was somewhere around 3:45pm…

In the room I read the instructions for the Libido pills and it said that you are supposed to take one or two at least an hour before the ‘action’. It also said that these pills should not be taken by people with high blood pressure. Unfortunately, I am one of those people. I was actually taking Lisinopril on a regular basis prior to moving out to Germany. The thing is that I was not able to successfully schedule an appointment with my regular doctor before flying over here so the prescription I had ran out just prior to my trip. Oh well, my blood pressure wasn’t exceptionally high and I have been doing a lot of walking over here in Europe. Heck, I’ve apparently been losing some weight as I have recently been having an issue with keeping my pants up while I’ve been walking. I’m wearing my belt at its tightest notch and the pants still want to continuously creep ever lower and lower… I’m thinking that my blood pressure may have lowered a bit since I’ve been over here but who really knows if that’s true…? It really didn’t matter though as I was going to at least try out these damn pills…

However it was quite early. I figured I’d take a couple pills with me and head on over to where Sarah (the girl in the baseball cap) was found a month ago. If she was there I would set up a time (at least one hour away) and come back to be with her. That was my plan and it never even occurred to me that she might not be there…

So I stock up on a couple pills, leave the shrooms in my room and grab the cheap pipe before heading out. It was time to find the girl in the baseball cap. Walking to the room that I found her in the month before was actually very easy. Amazingly enough I had no problem remembering where she was. I was a bit dismayed when I arrived there to find a different girl in the room. Oh no, where’s the girl in the baseball cap?

Oh well, I figured I’d ask the girl that was currently in the room – I didn’t have any recollection of ever meeting her before, but I suppose it’s possible that she was the girl in the baseball cap considering I was actually on shrooms the last time I met her. But she was a blonde and I was pretty darn certain that the girl in the baseball cap was a brunette. Could I possibly have been that screwed up last time? Well, let’s find out…

So I walk over to the room to have a chat with this blonde girl. She opens the door and asks me to come in. I then asked her if she was the girl that I met last month and mentioned that the girl that I am speaking of was wearing a white baseball cap. She suspected that I was speaking of the girl that’s in that room on the night shift. Right! I mean, what was I thinking? It was pretty late last month when I met the girl in the baseball cap so why was I expecting her to be there at about 4:00pm? Those would be some pretty rough hours to work… I then asked the blonde girl what time the other girl started and was told 8:00pm. Okay, now this is making sense. Not only that but it also gave me a plan. After thanking the cute blonde for the information and giving her a goodbye kiss on the check, I decided that I would head on over to a coffee house and waste away some time. At 7:00 I would then take one of the Libido pills and head back to visit with the girl in the baseball cap.

Oh yeah, Jon was also in Amsterdam over the weekend. He and his new squeeze, Veronica had arrived on Friday and where scheduled to be taking the same train as me back on Sunday. I sent a couple SMS messages to him on my arrival but had not received any reply. This really has nothing to do with the story but I just thought I would mention it. I was actually planning on perhaps meeting up with them and we could all hang out at a coffee shop, but this never happened. Now that I had four hours to kill, I once again attempted to contact Jon but once again received no response. Oh well, that’s cool … I can always hang out at a coffee shop by myself – you can usually meet some interesting people there…

After leaving the cute little blonde, I then started heading back toward a couple coffee shops that I knew of that usually seemed like decent places to hang out. I would first walk past the Stone’s Café (there are actually several Stone’s Cafés in Amsterdam, the one I’m talking about is actually located on this corner up near Coffee Shop 36) and then head on up to Coffee Shop 36 if it was too crowded. I actually stopped off at The Bull Dog (claims to be the original Amsterdam coffee shop) on the way and purchased myself some hash and weed. I didn’t stay there and opted to take my purchases with me up to Coffee Shop 36 (the Stone’s Café was a bit crowded). I took a seat by the windows and lit up a bowl…

I met a real nice couple there – John and Daniela. John was from England and Daniela was from Chili. They apparently met on some match making site on the Internet. I’m not sure how long they had been together, but they seemed to be getting along rather well. Maybe I should join one of these sites – it’s got to have a higher probability of success compared to what I have been doing… I don’t know though – it just seems to me that computer dating services are ‘cheating’. I’ve always been told that meeting the girl of your dreams always happens when least expected. To me, that seems to be a bunch of crap because I haven’t been expecting to meet her for quite a few years now and so far my expectations have been solid…

After a while John and Daniela left and slowly enough 7:00 arrived. This was when I took the first Libido pill and started looking forward to the trip back to the girl in the baseball cap. It was close to 7:20 when I headed out…

The walk back was much quicker than I expected and it was somewhere around 7:30 when I, once again, arrived back at the location where I had met the girl in the baseball cap the month before. The curtains of the target window were closed and it appeared like nobody was even there (there was no light inside). It was here that I heard some guy say, “He knows what he wants. Come back in 20 minutes.” Was he talking to me? Perhaps this was the girl in the baseball cap’s pimp? Whoever he was, he seemed to have decent advice and I was actually planning on following it…

Now this was interesting… As I was basically hanging around there waiting for the girl in the baseball cap to arrive, I noticed that I was not the only guy doing this. Apparently many of these girls have a few fans that know their schedules and show up early in an effort to be the first customer of the night. There weren’t many, maybe three or four; however I now realized that I was apparently a member of this crowd. Now there’s a club that I’m not very happy about being a member of…

The thing is that there was at least one other guy that might have been waiting for the girl in the baseball cap. He was basically hanging out near her window and trying to appear like he wasn’t – you know, he would take several short walks but always return… I decided to not even attempt to play it off like I wasn’t waiting and stood directly across from Sarah’s window and looked directly at it. Pretty much anybody and everybody knew why I was there. At about 10 to 8:00, Sarah (the girl in the baseball cap) arrived – sans cap this time. Unfortunately she arrived with this older guy (looked to be in his 40’s or 50’s) and headed straight into her room. Oh well, I guess my efforts still didn’t guarantee me first rounds, but I sure as hell tried… I decided to take the second Libido pill at this time and remained there – standing in front of Sarah’s window … I figured this guy wouldn’t take too long…

I was probably standing there for about 20 minutes or so when Sarah popped her head out between the two curtains and saw me standing across the narrow alley staring at her window. She smiled at me, waved and gave me the universal hand gesture of the number two (you know, hand raised with the index and middle finger extended). I guess I was to be the second customer. That’s cool, she seemed to actually be happy to see me – of course at this time I didn’t even know if she remembered me but the smile and wave seemed to be good signs…

Another 20 minutes or so and customer #1 was done. I saw him leave the room which was shortly followed by Sarah standing in her doorway and signaling for me to come in. I headed across the alley and entered the room with Sarah.

She actually did remember me from the month before. That was cool… I figured that this might be a nice time – I had taken two of the anti-ED pills and Sarah even remembered who I was. What could go wrong now…?

*** WARNING *** WARNING *** Okay, so here we are again. I need to warn you that this post will most definitely contain material not suited for non-adults as well as adults that can’t handle sexual conversations. If you are either of those, please stop reading now.

This time I give Sarah €150. If you remember, I gave her €100 (with a €10 tip afterwards) a month ago and she responded enthusiastically to the fact that I wasn’t trying to low-ball (no pun intended) her. I enjoyed myself last time and had no problem giving her a bit more on this trip. The way I figure it, if someone is deserving of a bit more than I’m more than happy to pay it. That was it, the money was done with and it was time to have a little fun. I’m sorry to say that that was exactly what we had – a “little” fun…

You see, I’m now pretty sure that all of my ED issues are purely in my head – the one on my shoulders… I guess that I just over analyze the situation which ends up being a very bad habit as the energy I am apparently wasting while thinking about what I am doing is draining the energy required to actually do what I am doing. Either that or the incredibly easy access to porn on the Internet has actually made me immune to standard sexual stimuli. Yeah, I’ll bet you it’s the latter of those two… Either way it was a bit over an hour after we started that Sarah started to get frustrated. I could tell that she had a bit of an issue in doing it, but she needed to ask me to leave – unfulfilled. I understood; after all this was her job. She actually let me stay there and try for 20 minutes longer than I had paid (I guess the standard pricing is €50 for 15 minute blocks – I pretty much knew this but you’re never going to see it written down anywhere…) and whether I would ever cum was basically an unanswerable question. My time with Sarah – the girl in the baseball cap – a meeting that I had been looking forward to for a month – ended with frustration. What the hell is wrong with me!?

I just don’t get it. I like Sarah. She’s a very nice person and she’s beautiful to boot. Here I am, though, a worthless slab of meat that is trying to pass himself off as a man; but I’m not a man. No, as far as women are concerned, I’m as useless as they come; and the sad fact of the matter is that they are right. What good am I if I can’t even perform with a real woman? It’s fucking pathetic (pun completely intended…).

The worst part about all this is that Sarah seemed to get upset about this. You remember how I was asking why the prostitutes were getting upset when I was unable to perform, right? Well, I think I’ve figured that out. You see Sarah told me that I was unique – unique in a bad way though… She said that I was the only (I need to emphasize that a bit – the ONLY) guy that she ever met that wasn’t able to cum – and she’s a prostitute! What’s that say about me? I’ll tell you what that says – it says that I need to figure out what’s wrong with me and soon … I’ve got a date in a couple of weeks down in Zürich where I better damn well perform! I think I’m going to have to lay off the sex for a bit. Maybe my problem has something to do with the fact that I’m having too much sex. I don’t know … why do I have such an insatiable sex drive if I can’t even perform? Life sure can be cruel at times…

Anyway, that’s how it ended with Sarah – we stopped having fun (well, I actually doubt either of us was having too much fun at that time), got dressed and I then left apologizing to Sarah and assuring her that my stupid problem in no way should be seen as an insult to her. Something tells me that I might not be greeted with a smile and a wave next time…

So there I was at about 9:30pm. The main reason I made this trip ended up being a disaster and I was feeling like a complete failure. It was Amsterdam though and I am a complete dumb ass. I was going to vindicate myself! There are plenty other girls available and I was determined to “be a man”. What I ended up being was most definitely not a man although you are going to have to wait for the rest of this story. I’ll post it shortly, but I’m done writing for the day.

bis später,

Coriolis

Janina

So I went to Zürich over the weekend…


Why did I go? I’m really not sure … it was just something I thought I would check out. I’ve actually been reading another blog on here that is being written up by this woman named Annika and she happens to live in Zürich. I even tried to set up a meeting with her for this trip but was unsuccessful in my attempts. That’s cool… It was just a “spur of the moment” thing anyway and I figured I could find some way to enjoy my time in Zürich without having the local tour guide for my trip. So, what I did was log on to the internet the day before the trip and did a search for “sex shop Zürich” and explored the results that were shown…

From the results that I got I can only conclude that Zürich is actually a pretty ‘happening” town when it comes to sex. I mean there were a lot of sites for various sexually oriented clubs and businesses – a LOT! It looked like there were several private clubs that someone could go to and pay an entry fee (the fees all seemed to be very reasonable – well less than €300) and basically spend the entire evening just “playing” around with the other guests. It looked to me like these were your basic swinger’s clubs. Now I’ve never been to a swinger’s club and I’m not really sure how well I would do at a place like that – I wrote down the address to one of these clubs figuring that I might check it out, if for nothing more, for curiosity. I then concentrated my efforts on the places that looked to be more like the strip club / sex shop places that I was more familiar with.

One of these places, Sol-fit had listed various prices for time blocks that could be purchased with the women that worked there. There were two categories of women that one could buy time with – models and V.I.P. girls. The pricing for the models was €150, €240 and €380 respectively for 30 minutes, 60 minutes and 90 minutes. For the V.I.P. girls, these were raised to €200, €300 and €440. There was also pricing for an Escort Service that, according to the website, was from 22:00 – 07:00. The cost of this was €1500. I was very interested in the Escort Service…

Many of you reading my blog may have noticed that I haven’t posted anything about the trip I took to Athens a couple weekends ago. There is a reason for this – I’m still trying to figure out exactly what happened to me there. What I need to tell you now is that I spent a LOT of money in Athens – and I do mean a LOT! I was basically a pawn that fell directly into the rather complex (well, I suppose it’s pretty simple, but executed with great precision on people like me) system that was designed to separate as much money from me as possible. Unfortunately, this is not the time to explain exactly what happened to me there, but rest assured that I will get that story up here sooner or later. For now all you need to know is that I spent a lot of money in Athens and came back with contact information for Anna. That was all I got for the money I spent however I am still hoping that, in the end, this will actually justify that trip. I mean I really do like Anna – but that’s another story for another time. Last weekend was Zürich.

I sent off a couple emails (one to Sol-fit and one to a place called The Bolero Club) to inquire a bit more on services offered. These emails were sent the Thursday before I was scheduled to be boarding a City Night Line train on Friday for the trip to Zürich. I had not received any responses from either email by Friday afternoon and decided to give Sol-fit a call and inquire about the Escort Service myself. Although the lady on the other end of the line didn’t speak English very fluently, I was able to provide my name and information on when I would be in Zürich as well as where I was staying. My name was taken down and I was told to call back from my hotel room after I had checked in. Okay, so I now had a plan for at least one thing to do in Zürich – I was going to call back from my hotel room. I wrote the contact information (including the name “Janina” which was the girl I chose from their site) in my notebook, packed up for the short trip and headed to Braunschweig’s Hauptbahnhof (main train station) for my 10:00pm train to Wolfsburg. It was in Wolfsburg that I would be catching the City Night Line train for the 10 hour ride to Zürich. I easily made the train, found my compartment (I actually purchased a bed for this trip – I figured I’d sleep through the 10 hour trip and basically just wake up in Zürich) and went to sleep.

These trains actually have varying class structures for varying prices, of course. I originally looked into getting a single bed compartment with a private bathroom (including shower) but opted to save about half of that cost and settled on a two bed compartment. I would most likely be sharing this compartment with an unknown, but what did I care? I planned on sleeping the entire trip anyway…

My roommate boarded the train a few stops later and it was exactly as I had suspected – no words were even exchanged (which is a good thing as I still can’t hold a conversation in German) and the man that was sharing my compartment took the lower bunk as I was already occupying the upper bunk. I spent the next 9 or so hours drifting in and out of sleep until Sylvia (I believe that was her name…), the lady that checked me in the night before, woke us up for breakfast. We were in Switzerland – not quite Zürich yet – and it was still a couple hours before our scheduled arrival time. I finished the trip by eating the breakfast served (a croissant, a roll with butter, three slices of cheese and a coffee), having a couple smokes and departing the train after it arrived at the Zürich Hauptbahnhof. It was a short walk to the Hotel Leoneck…

I arrived at the hotel to find that it was actually a very cow oriented design. It was kinda cute how everything at the hotel was somehow related to the bovine. There was even a restaurant attached to the hotel named The Crazy Cow. That’s cool – apparently the proprietors liked cows. I was able to check into my room a bit early (it was around 10:30am when I arrived) and took the elevator up to room #514 – the top floor…

The room was clean and actually rather small. It had this blue flower motif on the walls, a small bathroom, a desk with a small television, a full body mirror on the wall opposite the bed, a balcony looking out toward the Zürich shopping district and a single twin bed. You read that right – a single twin bed! This would end up becoming a bit of a problem but I had to work with what I was given. It was now time to try to call Sol-fit from my hotel room…

The first couple attempts didn’t go to well as I couldn’t figure out how to get an outside line from the hotel. It was written on the phone that all I needed to do was press ‘0’ for an outside line, but all of my attempts did not seem to be working. I finally called down to the front desk and inquired and they said to try it an a few minutes. A few minutes later I was able to get an outside line and called the number I had written down for Sol-fit. I ended up getting a recording in several different languages telling me that the number dialed was unable to accept calls at the current time. Did I write down the right number? I thought so… Oh well, it was early. I took a shower and watched some CNN (the only English channel available…).

It was around 2:00pm when I was finally able to get an answer on the line but the lady that answered appeared to not be able to hear me at all. I called back again with the same results. I then decided to call with my mobile phone and was finally able to speak with someone at Sol-fit. After explaining that I had just called a couple of times from my hotel room but that they were unable to hear me, I then finalized the purchase of the Escort Service for the evening. I attempted to arrange it so that Janina would maybe come by at 5:00pm instead of the standard 10:00 but had to settle for a meeting time of 8:00 instead. That was cool as I was buying 10 hours with Janina and, although I still think that an earlier start time would have been nice, I could be a bit flexible on this subject. So Janina was scheduled to be arriving at my hotel room at 8:00 that evening. I somehow needed to waste away about 6 hours…

After receiving a call in my hotel room from Sol-fit verifying my information – and luckily being able to speak with them on this call – I decided to head outside and take a walk around Zürich. Zürich is actually a very beautiful city; however I would describe it best as the perfect place for women. It’s all about shopping in Zürich. There are literally miles and miles of streets and alleyways packed full of various shops of all types. I purchased myself a cool Zippo lighter with a graphic of marijuana leaves on it in this interesting ‘head shop’ and bought myself some cologne for the evening to come. After heading down to the lake and taking a few pictures I returned back to my hotel around 5:00 or so. I took a nap, watched some TV and waited. Time has never passed so slowly…

After what seemed to be a few days, 8:00 finally arrived. I stepped out onto the balcony and began my surveillance. It was about 8:15 when I saw a taxi do a U-turn to pull up to the hotel entrance. A few minutes later there was a knock at my hotel room door. I opened the door and saw Janina standing there. In a joking manner, I looked at her puzzled and asked if I knew her. Her response was a bit surprised and I told her that I was only kidding and invited her in. She actually told me that it was refreshing to meet a man with a sense of humor and I informed her that I did, most definitely, have a sense of humor. I think I made a good first impression – I guarantee she made a great first impression. I mean this woman was beautiful – and she liked guys with a sense of humor. Yeah, she made a great first impression…

We sat down on the bed, lit up a couple of cigarettes and started to get acquainted. Not only was she drop-dead gorgeous, she was also very well spoken (in something like four languages) and intelligent. I learned that she was Hungarian by birth and was now living on an island in Spain. She was a model for a Spanish newspaper and was in Zürich (a city that she was not very fond of, by the way…) for something like one week to make some money. Janina is a very nice woman. Nice enough to make me veer a bit from my plans…

You see, I had an awful lot of time to kill as I was waiting for 8:00 to roll around. During this time I was pretty much devising a plan to try to get as much as I could for the €1500 that I would be spending. The thing is that I am no longer a “spring chicken” and, to make matters worse, I’ve recently been having a bit of trouble with ED (Erectile Dysfunction). I needed to plan this out so that I would hopefully be able to do what I used to be able to do when I was younger – I was thinking a minimum of three rounds … minimum… My plan was simple enough – meet with Janina, have sex (round 1), go out to dinner, return from dinner and have sex (round 2), perhaps sleep for a couple hours to reenergize, wake up a couple hours before she was scheduled to leave and have some more sex (round 3). That was the plan. This is what happened…

While I was sitting there on the bed with Janina and getting to know her, I decided to bypass the pre-dinner round one. This girl was just way too sweet to invite into my room and demand sex right away. Besides, I was enjoying our conversation so much that I didn’t want to mess with a good thing and decided to take her down to the Crazy Cow for some dinner. I could wait until after dinner before starting with the ‘dessert’ – Janina was going to be my dessert. We headed down to the Crazy Cow…

The dinner was good. The conversation (other than my poor ability to hear well in open areas) was interesting. I think Janina was actually more sexually attracted to our waiter than she was to me; but she was stuck with me since I recently just gave her €1500. Don’t take that the wrong way, I was okay with it. I mean she’s 26 years old. She tried to hide it a bit, but I could tell – she liked our waiter… That didn’t matter though – I was guaranteed that she would be returning back to the room with me. Okay, sure, in a perfect situation she would have been more attracted to me but there’s not much I can do about that. I, however, had the €1500 to spend so the waiter will just have to wait his turn… After dinner I purchased a bottle of champagne, borrowed a couple champagne glasses from the restaurant and headed back up to my room with Janina.

I brought a couple ‘special’ cigarettes with me on this trip and figured that that would be an excellent ice breaker and maybe be a smooth transition into the sex. I asked Janina if she wanted to smoke one and she seemed a bit tentative at first but soon agreed. She said it had been a while since she smoked marijuana but that it wasn’t anything new to her. We sat on the bed and shared a smoke. Janina’s reaction was a serious case of the giggles. She was so cute sitting there next to me and just laughing! She was having a bit of trouble completing her thoughts but god she was cute! I then walked her up to the full length mirror and we began to undress each other. We then headed over to the little bed and had some fun.

I did everything I could to satisfy this woman; unfortunately, thanks to the damn ED issue I’m currently experiencing, I needed to rely primarily on my oral skills. This seems to be a consistently repeating situation with me lately. It’s frustrating as hell although, and I really don’t mind patting myself on the back a bit, it has given me plenty of opportunities to further hone my oral skills. Janina seemed to be satisfied and I must admit that I do enjoy satisfying the women. This fucking ED problem that I seem to have acquired is really beginning to bug me though. Janina, however, was a good sport about it and I was able to “finish” although the climax was rather anti-climatic… I didn’t let that bother me though as I was sure that I would be getting at least one more chance. I was wrong about this, but that’s just the way things go with me…

After we had finished the sex, it was – if I remember correctly – somewhere around 1:00 in the morning. I was going to have Janina there until 6:00 though, so we were actually only half way through the time purchased. This was where things started going wrong…

You see, Janina was tired and actually wanted to go to sleep. I, on the other hand, was wide awake and horny (although ineffectual thanks to the ED problem…). I got out of bed and smoked the other “special” cigarette that I brought – Janina didn’t want any more. I tried to get things started up again with Janina but quickly realized that she wasn’t the least bit interested and soon decided that I should let her get some sleep. I laid on the bed cuddling with her and just looked at her as she went to sleep. She was so cute. I so much wish I had a picture of her face as she was lying there. That’s an image that I never want to forget.

This was where the problem with the damn bed came into play. I had Janina set her alarm for 4:00 in the hope that we could have some fun before she left at 6:00 and tried to get some sleep myself. It was actually 3:15 when I let Janina leave. She was complaining about the small bed and my snoring. What could I do? Sure, I paid €1500 for the 10 hours, but it was more than apparent that Janina just wanted to leave. At 3:15, she did just that…

An interesting side note to this story is that I did actually give Janina the URL to this blog. I doubt she will actually read this as I am under the impression that she thinks I’m a jerk. I’m hoping that my impression is wrong, but I have to admit that that is pretty much how I felt – like a jerk. If you are reading this, Janina, please let me apologize. I’m sorry about the stupid small bed – the travel plans were made long before I knew I would be having a guest for the night. I’m sorry about the snoring – believe me, I know how annoying that is to others. Most of all I’m sorry about the way I was acting. You might not believe this, but I am actually a rather nice guy. The whole problem here was that I was spending more money than I should have been and I was a bit upset with myself over not sticking with the plans that I had been devising throughout the day. I really do think that you are a wonderful person and it saddens me to think of all the crap that you must have to go through to make money with the profession that you have chosen…

Also, this little battle I now get to face with my ED problem is frustrating as hell for me. The first thing I did after returning to my apartment in Braunschweig was go online and order up some Viagra! I need all the help I can get as I really don’t know how much more my self esteem can take…

Well, this story is ending up quite a bit longer than I was expecting (shocking, I know…) so I think I’m going to end it here for now and fill you readers in on my Sunday in Zürich a bit later. It’s an interesting story and I ended up dropping a lot of money – I won’t say exactly how much, but the night with Janina was a bargain… My newfound ambition of living my life to the fullest is becoming quite expensive. I was even considering canceling my trip to Paris this next weekend but have since decided that I’m going to go. I’m planning on just doing the tourist “thing” there anyway, so I’m hoping that it won’t be nearly as expensive as the last couple of trips; but I suppose one never knows. I am who I am…

bis später,

Coriolis