Whores...

So what do I do next? I go for a walk… I just finished my visit with Sarah (unsuccessful) and was a bit peeved over wasting €50 on the Libido pills that were completely useless. I figured I needed to walk this one off…

The thing is, I was in Amsterdam’s Red Light District – everywhere I walked there were prostitutes. I was very upset with not being able to complete the deal with Sarah and was basically walking it off through a plethora of “attainable” women – you just needed to give them a bit of cash. I’ll tell you right now that this is most definitely not the place that I needed to be “walking off” my failure. It was just a matter of time before I decided to try again – maybe I needed variety? While walking down an alley, I got a glimpse of this lady with what looked like reading glasses on – the librarian type otherwise known as the “good girl gone bad”. What the heck, I’ll give that a try.

** WARNING ** WARNING **
Okay, so I probably don’t need to say much; however I’m writing another post about Amsterdam’s Red Light District and I want to make sure that you, the reader, know what you are getting yourself into. If you’re under 18, please stop reading here. I’m sure you can find some interesting stuff over at Mtv.com or Disney.com but you really shouldn’t be reading this. Also, even if you are of age but have issues with sexuality please stop reading as well. I’m not planning on being too descriptive here, but you really never know what I’m stupid enough to type at times… You’ve been warned…

So I do a quick U-turn and head back to the woman that was wearing the glasses, enter her foyer and offer her €100 for a bit of fun. She invites me back to her room (the room that she “performed” in was actually down the hallway a bit from where she was attracting customers – this is a common thing…) and I start following her down the hall. It is now that I actually get my first real look at this woman and must admit that I was a bit disappointed. To sum it up in one well-known phrase, all I can say is “baby got back”. Now don’t get me wrong here, I realize that there are many men out there that are into the women with larger than average behinds – usually I’m not one of them. At this point in time, I really didn’t care. I was going to roll the dice and see what came up…

The answer to that was nothing. I didn’t even bother wasting too much of this lady’s time and decided that the €100 was just one more loss. I mean come on … there’s got to be something that I can do… I know, I’ll head back out and give it another go with one of the silicon filled boy-toys that are around here – there are plenty to choose from. I usually steer clear of this variety (they’re not the nicest people and they always have a bloated sense of superiority just because of the way they look – I’m not a fan of this…) but am trying to figure out what might work. I’m carrying €250 and I hide €150 behind my credit cards in my wallet and plan to use the remaining €100 to perhaps buy a half hour with one of the “beautiful people”. I see this blonde bombshell dressed up in a police uniform turned bikini and decide to stop and have a visit…

Her name was Benny. I’m telling you this just in case any of you readers are planning on heading to Amsterdam soon. If you go and meet up with a blonde bombshell (perhaps wearing a police uniform turned bikini) that tells you her name is Benny, leave as quickly as you can! Wait, I take that back … tell her Glen said “hi”, punch her square in the nose and then get the hell out of there! This bitch is mean! Here’s what this fucking whore decided to do to me:

I do the nice guy play and offer her €100 (the standard starting offer is €50, but I’ve discovered that the €50 doesn’t buy a guy much respect and usually leads to trouble ahead…) and she leads me back to her room. This is where the “routine” gets started. She begins, right away, telling me that we could have a lot more fun if I paid her €150 more. Interestingly enough, that was exactly how much I hid away in my wallet. Now remember, my night is not going very well and I’m very desperate to change that. I actually agree to the €250 price and give Benny the €150 that I hid in my wallet. You see, this is one of the reasons I stay clear of women like this – they know exactly how to take advantage of chumps like myself. I knew this, but I wasn’t thinking clearly – it’s amazing how much influence bad sexual experiences have on my logical skills…

So I’m in for €250. This should be enough for Benny. Okay, let’s get started… But wait, Benny then starts going on about how she wants to invite her “girlfriend” over and the three of us could have some fun. She starts telling me that for €500 (€250 more) I could have a real god time with the two of them. The thing is that I must be the dumbest man on the face of the Earth. I’ve done this ménage before – 3 or 4 times actually – and it’s always a bad idea. The current situation turns into this thing where Benny starts acting like she really wants her “friend” to be there and if I refuse that I wasn’t going to be having much fun. Oh well, maybe it’ll be better if the women involved actually wanted to be having sex with each other – that could be interesting… I reluctantly agree to head out to an ATM, get another €250 and return back for the fun.

As I’m getting dressed to head out again, the price suddenly shoots up and Benny starts telling me that I need to get €500 from the ATM! Fuck that!! I start removing my clothes again and tell Benny that there is no way in hell I’m getting another €500 and she quickly changes her story back to what we had agreed earlier. Apparently if I get the €250 it will be sufficient. I’m not feeling the least bit good about this, but I’m stupid enough to head out and get the required €250.

Oh yeah, and one more thing – you may already be aware of my admiration for pussy… This was also discussed with Benny before I was stupid enough to agree to get more money. What she told me was that, if I got the €250 more, there would be no issue. I would be able to do “whatever I desired” with both of the women. For some stupid reason, I believed her…

I returned back to Benny’s window with the additional €250 and am immediately invited in. After handing the money over, Benny calls across the alley and invites her friend over. The three of us then head back to Benny’s little room. Okay, let’s get this party started!

These two actually were friends. The reason I say this is because the next treat that I am presented with is the wonderful chance to lie naked on a bed between the two of them as they sat there and gossiped about a bunch of bullshit. This was when I started realizing that these were a couple of mean women. I mean yeah, that’s great, people often gossip at work; but I had just paid €500! Gossip on your own time – I paid for this time – do your job! It appeared as the gossip session was over when the friend began to lean over me. Right there in front of my face were two very well formed (and most likely rather expensive…) breasts. I leaned forward to kiss these newly met friends and get them pulled away with a firm notification that I’m not allowed to do that. WHAT?! What the hell did I just pay €500 for?! Not only that, but Benny had already promised me that I would be able to “kiss” much more than the breasts!

Well, that was it. I then called Benny a liar and laid there dejected as any erection that I was able to attain quickly vanished. I was then forced to lie there and get preached to by a couple of prostitutes! Get this! They were telling me that this was all my fault and how if I would have just laid there passively that everything would have gone smoothly. No shit everything would have gone smoothly – I just wouldn’t have had any fun. The whole reason that I was stupid enough t pay the €500 was to have some fun! The conversation got a bit heated and I actually demanded my money back (yeah, right, like that’s going to happen…). They refused to give me any money back and we were all aware that nothing was going to happen now – I was pissed!

Benny then suggested that I head out, take a walk and maybe smoke some weed. She was saying that I could return when I settled down a bit and they would pick up from where we left off – without me getting what was promised, of course… What could I do? It sounded like the only way I was going to get anything for the €500 I had already spent so I agreed. I headed over to the Stone’s Café and ordered a Coke. I sat there, smoked a couple bowls and drank my Coke. While doing this I came to the conclusion that I was just going to have to “suck it up” and play by these bitch’s rules – whatever … I could do that. I headed back to Benny’s window…

She was there. She had her little boom-box playing some shitty music and she was once again standing in her window luring in other unsuspecting chumps. I walked up to the window expecting to get let in. Unfortunately though, she never opened the door. Instead she just looked at me and grinned. She then reached over and turned the shitty music up a bit louder, staring at me and basically laughing the whole time. The only thing she said to me was “You’re too rough!” I’m too rough?! You have got to be kidding me! She wasn’t going to let me in!! FUCK!!!

She then got out her cell phone and started calling somebody (her pimp, I would assume). It was then that I decided to head down the alley a bit more and try to get my thoughts together. Well, it looks to me like I was just ripped off by a couple prostitutes for some €500! I stayed down the alley for a few minutes then headed back to Benny’s window…

I slowly walked by and loudly said to her, “You are a mean woman!” She quickly got on her phone and I just slowly continued to walk away. As I was walking away and blending into the large crowd, I distinctly heard a male voice behind me say, “Which one is he?” The response to this was a female voice (perhaps Benny) saying, “Dark coat and red T-shirt!” Funny thing is that I was wearing a black leather jacket and a red T-shirt… Luckily, however, my back was to them and my shirt was out of view. I heard a couple guys behind me getting stopped by the owner of the male voice that I heard earlier and a couple more iterations of the “Which one is he?” question as I continued to slowly walk away with the crowd.

What the fuck is that all about?! I mean, come on, I paid €500 and got nothing. Why does this suddenly put me into a situation where I’m apparently being hunted down by a pimp? I didn’t do anything wrong! I’ll tell you this though – I’m not going to feel nearly as sorry for the next whore that gets beaten up by a customer. I’ll bet she most likely deserved it…

bis später,

Coriolis